A couple of years ago I was getting so anxious at night that I started seriously considering getting a dog. My family had had dogs my entire life so I was used to having them, but I had never had one of my own. I also thought that it might be an idea to train the dog as an autism support dog for Noah.
So at the end of July I went into the local SPCA to check things out. My sister came along as she was also considering getting a dog eventually. I saw a little black Lab cross puppy. She was the last of an entire litter of puppies that had been brought in. I had wanted a Lab cross, because they are absolutely amazing family dogs. We'd had one purebred and a few crossbreeds, so I know firsthand how awesome they are.
I decided to take her home that same day. So my husband built her a box and I bought all the supplies and she sat in my lap quietly as my sister drove us home.
Sean, who was one at the time, thought she was great. Noah, on the other hand, showed no indication that he even noticed she was there. It was the first glaring proof for us that he was autistic. It took three months before he would even look at her.
The first two days were great, aside from the barking and whining. After that, our little Eva (named so because it was the only female name I knew for sure that Noah could say, from the movie "Wall-e") turned into a nutcase. She would chase the kids and knock them down and chew on their necks. She would hook her paws around the front of their legs and gnaw on the backs of their knees. A few short encounters and Sean was starting to show that he was afraid of her. The last thing I wanted was a dog which was agressive towards my kids, and kids who were afraid of the family dog.
Fortunately for the entire family, my best friend is a dog trainer. So I called her alot for advice and got her signed up for puppy classes right away. If not for those classes, I'm sure I would have returned her to the SPCA in the first six months. I kept Eva and the kids separated unless I could directly supervise their interaction.
In class Eva taught me a few things I desperately needed to learn. When she would get easily distracted and lose focus I would get angry and rammy with her. This only proved to make the situation worse. I learned to back up and reward her for the little things in order to get her (and myself) refocused and calmed down. It was a truly valuable lesson that I apply when dealing with Noah at his bad times. Instead of yelling and getting angry (which, truth be known, I still do sometimes) I will give both Noah and I a time out. I put him in his room alone until he settles down, and we're both the better for it. If not for Eva and her "ADHD" I had to learn to deal with, I honestly think I could have become an abusive parent.
As Eva has grown, so also has she mellowed. She's easier to work with and doesn't bark as much. She will never be calm enough to be a support dog for Noah, but she's been a great support dog for me. She stays outside most of the day, but she sleeps inside at night. I know if anyone was to come in our house, she would bark, and I would know something was wrong. So I don't check the locks over and over again at night. She gets me out of the house, whether going to train, or just for a walk.
I don't walk her as often as I should, but I'm working on improving that. I try to take her to my parents' acreage once a week so she can run, in any case. She's not the calm, low-energy dog I was looking for when I got her, but I made a committment, and I've stuck to it. We're both learning and improving as we go.
Noah will play with her now. He looks at her and smiles and runs away in an effort to get her to chase him. And she does. She's pretty good with personal space now, only running the kids over on the rare occasion. And she "calls off" well. If I tell her "off", even from a ways away, she backs off.
I didn't get the dog that I wanted. But I learned so much from the one that I got. And she's my Eva, and I love her. I will have her for the rest of my life and I will take good care of her the whole time. Cuz she takes care of me.
-Nan
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